Let’s End 2017 Mit Dem Führer Des Geisteskrankes Sludge Funk Punk Musik Gruppes… ELEFANT!

27 December 2017

So many questions surround metallic sludge funk punks ELEFANT. Where do they come from? Where will they go? Are they the lost sons of the Chernobyl engineers who fucked up back in 1988 or are they related to that evil hip-hop gang, called the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Are they evil? Are they good? They communicate verbally, now and then, using a weird German code language. They claim to be peaceful although all their propaganda video clips are horrific and stuffed with hidden messages to confuse us, earthlings.  After
I overcame my panic fear, with a couple of red Bordeaux bottles, I had the guts to contact Wolf, the leader of this mysterious Ausländer combo to get some answers on as many questions as possible. Let’s enter the wicked world of these mischievous screwballs starting with one of their finest carols, a head-splitting hammer revealing the band’s
psychotic pain, helpless hopelessness, and demonic damage…

Guten Abend Herr Wolf
Welcome at Turn Up The Volume!

Where can we find traces of ELEFANT‘s roots: on Jupiter, Mars, the Milky Way, Snicker or an der schönen blauen Donau?
“Beyond the horizons of Venus YOU will FIND the Holy Spirit.”

What was the band’s most memorable experience during
their stay on Planet Earth in 2017?

“We had a great deal of fun staying in Studio Moskou. With legendary sound engineer
P. Landman we recorded our album in 3 days! TBC!”

What will be on ELEFANT’s New Year’s diner table: Bratwurst oder Kaese Spaetzle?
“None of the above, we’ll be sticking to our daily Zoloft dose.”


Tasty stuff

Best home for psychotic elephants: Guantanamo Detention Camp,
the Antwerp Zoo or the White House?

Guantanamo is to destroy humans, so let’s skip that one. The Antwerp Zoo, you mean ‘t Schoon Verdiep or that poor thing where animals are locked up? Maybe it’ll be the White House that we’ll be staying this weekend.”


The White House Zoo, this weekend…

Do ELEFANT members make babies the way humans do?
“YES! With a lot of LOVE.”

Which Xmas gift did you return to the one who gave it to you, this year?
“Xmas is for X-men, I stopped doing X in 1994.”


Party time…

Glühwein or Blue Jupiler?
“I prefer Earth‘s most wasted fluid: water. It melts in your mouth, not in your hands.”

‘Mumbo Jumbo’: fake or real song?
“Well, it’s a song, well kind of. Uhm, it’s a dance. It’s a song and a dance, but you don’t
want to dance, do you?”

Freddie Kreuger or Harvey Weinstein?
“Who are they? We don’t do sports.”

Vinyl, cassette or barrel organ?
“Vinyl.”

What movie would you pick to visualize ELEFANT’s
supercalifragilisticexpialidocious melodies?

“Ingmar Bergman’s ‘Persona’. Funky Shit.”

666 or ‘one-two-three-four’?
“We don’t have that many songs in ¾, so I guess it’ll be 1-2-3-4.”

Most scary creature on this planet: Bono, the Pope, Ozzy Osbourne, Pokémon or a(ny) Belgian politician?
“Bono’s pretty scary when he dresses up as a businessman. The Pope wears a dress.
Ozzy these days is scary when he farts.”


Fartman…

Rammstein oder Hof Von Commerce?
Hof Von Commerce have better rhymes and looks.”

Donald Trumpet oder Vladivostok Putin?
“Donald for being the new kid on the block. What a fresh wave of shit.”


Shit, indeed…

Any new ELEFANT noise in the pipeline for the new year?
“For RSD we’ll be releasing a split 10’’ with our friends of FOPAW. In May we’ll be releasing our first full album through 9000 Records!!!!!! EXCLAMATION MARKS!!!!!”

Audi oder Mercedes?
“I stopped doing drugs in 1996.”

Held(in) des Jahres?
“I stopped doing heroes in 1997.”

Barbie oder Beyoncé?
Barbie for perseverance. Beyoncé for president.”


Make America sing in harmony again, Beyo

Schweinhund von 2017?
“We tend to accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative. So no Schweinehund-elections für me this year.”

‘Jede uhr Tickt’: a song for the soundtrack of ‘Apocalypse Now’ or ‘Wagner’s Gödverdommedämmerung’?
” ‘Jede Uhr Tickt‘ is most suitable for children’s parties and wedding dances. It was actually inspired by Irreversible. A Nightmare directed by Gaspard Noé.

Beste lange Spielplatte von 2017?
“Arca by Arca.”

Bestes Lied des Jahres?”
“For me personally, the song of the year is an old Belgian one by Jan De Wilde, titled ‘De Eerste Sneeuw‘. It’s blatant romantic and I love how it makes me feel. Happy and blue.”

Bestes Konzert des Jahres?
“Ho99o9, Pukkelpop Kiewit. FUN FUN FUN!!!”

Waltz oder Polonaise?
“I prefer the Waltz: it’s gracious and beautiful. Polonaise is
a dance for drunk, unimaginative rake pigs.”


Fürher Wolf organizing a dance for drunk, unimaginative rake pigs…

Was sind die ELEFANT neue Jahre Wünsche?
“Live your life by your will, learn to be an animal.”

Vielen Dank für diesen exklusive babbel, mein Fûhrer!

I guess we know a little bit more about those Mutterrockers.
But not all. Whatever. Let’s dance like it’s 1999 again…
Hail Hail ELEFANT!


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ELEFANT on Facebook


Bis nächstes Jahr, geisteskrankes sludge funk punk Ausländer …

(Concert pics by JL/Turn Up The Volume!)

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